As a new parent, I have new responsibilities now. My first priority is my son and then comes everything else- My husband, the rest of my family, our home and so on. So what about my career? Where should I put this on my list? What will happen to all the years I spent studying and getting a degree from a prestigious college in Dubai? What will happen to all the effort I put in to get to the level I’m in my career?
This doesn’t mean I’m saying it’s not enough to be a stay-at-home mom or a home-maker. It’s not easy to take care of a home, kids, in-laws and still find time to do something for oneself!! I have seen my mother, sister and all the women in my family do it. But what if you desire to have something more? To be more than who you are right now?
A full-time Childcare is not affordable in Switzerland (I am sure this is the case in many countries). I don’t have anybody other than my husband to take care of my little one. So the option I had was to cut down on the work I was doing. And what was the outcome? I saw a difference in the behavior of my peers towards me. All the good and big projects were and still are given to my male counterpart. When most of the men get their promotions, I won`t be getting any.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not in any way trying to demotivate women from having babies. Neel is the best thing to have happened in my life. I wouldn’t change that for anything!! What I am trying to convey here is If you feel like the whole world is passing you by and you feel stuck in one place, like you are not able to keep up, it’s OK to step back and watch everyone run. One day, your turn will come too, when the world will stop to watch you grab the stars! Until then, why not enjoy and be grateful for the things we are blessed with in our lives?
-Madhurya.
Comments
Manasa
Even though I did not write this post, I really wanted to reply. I was almost in tears as I read your comment-“my heart aches and chokes”. I can see u will be a great mama. U already feel so much pain n dilemma when u think of your future as a mother and a career woman.
We women have to plan so far ahead, while men don’t have to worry about managing work n home.
But I can assure u you’ll know what to do when u get there. 😊Madhurya
Thank you so much for your sweet comments. We can find lots of inspiration from other women. Technology has helped us too in many ways to make our lives easy. Dont worry you will do an awesome job managing work and children(when you have one)
Maddie
I hear you. I took a 7 year break from my job/career to look after my son after we moved to Scotland. Childcare was not cheap, although it was available. I was a homemaker/stay at home mum. I started working a few months ago. Although it is not cutting edge multinational company, I have a job. I have other priorities than just my work. I can tell you this, priorities change over time, kids grow up and they don’t need you as much. So taking a break or reducing working hours is an option.
Madhurya
Thank you so much for your sweet comments. We can find lots of inspiration from other women. Technology has helped us too in many ways to make our lives easy. Dont worry you will do an awesome job managing work and children(when you have one)
Manisha
A mother after giving birth realizes that she is capable of giving birth to new possibilities. No wonder they are called superwoman. go girl <3
ameliadelphino
Aaahhhhh, Exact same dilemma. I hate that women have to face a penalty for having kids. Big time confusion with this topic. So sad that I have to think so much about career instead of just going and confidently becoming a mother.
Madhurya
I agree with you. Many times I even feel guilty and I wonder if I am a good mother. But I think its ok. We are doing our best in every possible way. I am sure you will do a great job managing both your job and your child.
ameliadelphino
I know! I keep hearing that and can envision it happening. So much stress. Sigh. Thank you 🙂
mithilavijay
You are a great mom sweetie! All mothers feel guilty at some point or the other… I sometimes go crazy and just wish for an hour of time for myself… But then instantly feel guilty… That surely doesn’t make me a bad mom… Well I hope it doesn’t… 😋
You wanting to work is totally fine..
We do tend to work that much more harder… Don’t we?
Why a woman always has to compromise is beyond me…
I guess until workplaces start offering on site child care or at least compensating working moms, we just gotta do whatever we possibly can….
Manasa
Hmmmm… True. Life, especially, a career gets complicated once a baby comes into picture. Atleast in the beginning, but u will eventually work something out, don’t worry. Times have changed. There are so many options to balance both motherhood and a career. Enjoy these days before u welcome a newborn…. They will never come back.
(By the way your blog is awesome!)
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shiviphoenix
So true but hard to implement.. but once we understand this, nothing else matters. A child is indeed precious and letting go career opportunities might hurt us but at the end child and family is for whom we are doing all these. I don’t have kids yet but when I think of future with kids and handling both jobs and child, my heart aches and chokes. I find myself in a position where I can’t leave both… Neither the baby nor the job.. Hats off to ladies including you who are able to manage this so beautifully. Stay blessed!